Where were you

Where were you when I needed  you the most? All I wanted was a person to call my father someone that was there to show me how a man was suppose to treat me. But you where not there for me. The thing that gets me the most is that you want me to have full respect for you but how can I respect you 100 percent when I barely even known you. All I really ever wanted was for you to be there for me and be a dad. But now I know that you were to busy to be the father I needed. I thank God that I had a wonderful Mother that was there for me she was my mom and my dad and I know that without her I wouldn't be the person that I am today. The funny thing is that now that I am older you want to try and be my father but now I feel as if I don't need one anymore I am who I am because of my mom, and you had nothing to do with it at all. Maybe that is why it is hard for me to trust a guy cause you made so many promises to me and now I am blah...don;t really have words to describe the pain that I feel. All I want is to find a man and be happy but I don't know if I ever will cause my past still kinda hunts me. I just wanted you to be a part of my life and show me that way a man should treat me but you never did. I just pray that one day God will help me to forgive you and that I will find the right man and be happy with him.